Adam Lambert Breaks Down His Queer Journey, Early 'Idol' Success & Touring with Queen

I think I was in an indoor soccer league at one point,

and I made one goal and I was very proud of myself.

We were leaving the game that day

and I said, okay, I'm done.

And my dad was like, but you made a goal.

And I'm like, that's all I needed to do.

I joined this for the shin guards, you know,

I don't really...

It was for the costume, you know.

[recording device beeping]

Hi everyone, I'm Adam Lambert,

and today we're gonna be looking back on some key moments

that have shaped my identity and my career.

This is Becoming Adam Lambert.

So I grew up in San Diego, California.

I was a sort of a ball of hyperactivity.

I started pretty early kind of understanding

that I was probably different than the other boys in school.

I don't think it really like clicked for me,

until I was in about sixth grade.

And I started going, oh, okay, got it.

Like, this is how I'm wired.

But I'm very lucky.

My parents were super liberal and super cool.

I came out at the end of high school, so I was 18.

I graduated, I came out to like my three best friends,

and then my mom kind of outed me.

She was like, so what's the deal?

And finally I was like, yeah, and I am, yes, I'm gay.

And she was like, yeah, I knew that.

And I was like, why didn't you ask me sooner?

And she said, well, I went to the gay lesbian center

in San Diego, when you were like 14.

And I asked them what to do,

and they said, just let him come out to you.

So she, the whole time they were like, just waiting,

like, just patiently, like he's gonna come out.

I went for the one of the few schools

that had a BFA available in musical theater.

So Cal State Fullerton in Orange County,

is where I got accepted.

And right around the same time that classes started,

I had been cast in a production of Grease the Musical.

And by like week five of school,

as I finished the production that I was in,

down in San Diego, I was like, I don't want to do this.

I wanna do theater.

I don't want to sit in a classroom.

And I kept auditioning around LA.

Got a couple auditions, even for things in New York.

Got flown to New York a couple times,

but never landed the part.

And there was an audition for Hair The Musical,

it was a German production.

I wanted it so bad.

I got it.

It was an amazing experience.

I grew so much as a person doing that show,

because I felt more comfortable in my skin.

And I was in Germany, where it's like,

queerness was so like, cool.

People looked individual, and they were unashamed

of their queerness.

And just being around that, I fell in love with Europe.

And then I got cast in Wicked.

But after about six months of it, I'm like, I don't like it.

I went home going, I wanna be a rock star.

I ran outta money in five minutes.

And so I begged to get back in the company

and they put me in it.

And I did that for two years in LA,

while I was working on music on the side.

And that brings us to American Idol.

And a lot of flat ironing.

[Bohemian Rhapsody]

♪ Mama, just killed a man ♪

♪ Put a gun against his head ♪

♪ Pulled my trigger, now he's dead ♪

I never thought that it was a show

that I would be able to do.

A, I'm a theater kid.

Also, I'm gay, which never seemed

to really land very well in that show.

I mean there definitely were a few,

but they all kind of got like,

not taken seriously, you know?

And I was just like, I don't know if that's gonna...

I would never.

I never even thought about it.

I was 27, I was in the last year

that you're eligible for it.

And I was like, why not?

Their whole rule is, we want you in amateur status.

We can't have you, an agent attached to you,

or a deal with this person, or that.

I had to quit Wicked,

and cancel any sort of entertainment contracts

that I had in play.

So basically quitting my job, which was my pay,

my insurance, all that stuff.

I had to quit to take a chance,

to sing in front of the TV judges.

So walking into the room, I was like, I'm gonna get this.

And I sang a Michael Jackson song.

And the judges behind the table were like.

And I could see by their faces,

I'm like, this isn't clicking for them.

I'm gonna...

They're gonna be like, thanks a lot and I'm gonna be done.

And I looked at them and I went...

Do you want me to sing something else?

And they were like, what else do you have?

And I'm like, what about a queen song?

And so that's how that went down.

It was my second song that they used on TV.

And that sort of became my lane on the show.

And I picked Mad World because it spoke to me.

I mean, it was a song about being an outsider,

and how emotional that can make you feel.

It reminded me of how I felt in middle school.

I think it was like movie week.

And my brother had always loved this song.

And I basically just lifted the version from Donny Darko.

And I think the producers started to really trust me.

And I remember when it came time to like figure out

what the staging was,

I'm like, I wanna do something different.

I wanna sit in a chair and dark light.

And they were like, Go, do it, you're doing great.

And so the staging things theatrically kind of felt

like something that was up my alley.

And the whole experience was great.

[upbeat music]

Being gay on American Idol was like a trip.

I had been out since I was 18.

I was not shy about who I was.

It was never a secret after I came out.

I wasn't ashamed of it at all,

but I was really settled in my gayness.

And I knew going into the show, I'm like, okay,

this is a whole different ballgame.

And so people started to dig, you know,

and I had had like a social media profile,

on a thing called Tribe,

which was like an alternative MySpace.

I had posted on their pictures of me and an ex-boyfriend,

like making out in like drag.

And these people found these pictures,

and they were like, Look, he's kissing a boy.

Then the publicist for the show had called me before to say,

Hey, I don't know if you saw this.

And I said, Yeah, I saw it.

And she was so great.

She was like, well, how do you wanna deal with it?

She's like, what do you wanna say?

And so I just said to the reporter, I'm like,

Yeah, that's me. [laughing]

That's all I said.

I'm like, and.

You know, so I did the like, media trick of kind of like

acknowledging but not giving anymore.

The publicist that I got assigned coming off of the show

was really great.

He was really savvy, he was gay.

He's like, I think we should work it.

And so they booked me the cover of Rolling Stone,

which was like, well, that's a good place

to come out of the closet.

That seems pretty cool.

So yeah, I think I lost some fans at that point,

but I always said to myself like,

well, those aren't the fans I want anyway.

If they think I'm gay and that's not...

They don't like that, then go away.

That's who I am.

[upbeat music]

Yeah, I look back on that experience

and it's pretty amazing.

I mean, I felt approved of,

I felt like people were really excited

about what I was about to do.

You know, Lady Gaga had a song for me,

that we recorded together.

Pink gave me a song.

Matt Bellamy from Muse.

Rivers Cuomo from Weezer.

Justin Hawkins from The Darkness.

Linda Perry, I worked with.

Like, all these just like luminaries,

that were heroes of mine, you know?

And you know, Pink's, What Do You Want From Me?

was my big hit.

Thanks Pink, for kicking it off of your album.

Thank you.

[upbeat music]

When someone told me this, I didn't believe them,

but apparently in America, that was the first time

that an out gay person had a number one debut.

And it's a milestone I'm really proud of.

One of the songs I wrote on the album

is called Outlaws of Love.

I was just writing about the experience,

of being sort of persecuted for being who you are.

I think I was starting to become more and more interested

in being a leader in that space.

And sort of having a positive effect on young people,

who are also queer and trying to explain things

to the masses that might not understand them.

Or, you know, it was a moment

I felt like I could do some good.

[live rock music]

So I met Brian May and Roger Taylor of Queen

on the finale of American Idol.

It felt like a click.

I remember looking at Brian as I was singing,

he was playing and he was kind of like, oh.

After my, my first solo tour, something came up with them,

and they were gonna do a medley and they needed a singer.

And of course I immediately said yes.

And as soon as I hung up the phone,

I went, oh my God, can I pull this off?

I knew their fans would be really, really critical

and skeptical of this.

More or less, it was well received.

But I definitely read some stuff online

that was not into it.

So this, I mean, these are all the things I think,

that throughout my career,

going and reading the comments has been

sort of a double-edged sword.

Sometimes it's the worst thing you can do.

But it's also kind of kept me humble,

and it's kept me fighting to be better.

[upbeat music]

Well, I think after Original High

I understood what anxiety and depression was.

You know, for the first time

I'd been able to put a name on it.

I wanted to write something that sort of

helped pull me out of that time.

It gave me purpose again, it gave me a feeling of hope.

You know, it allowed me to do something different.

And it became sort of the mantra of moving forward.

Like, I don't care anymore about people that don't get it.

One of the songs I created on the album

is called Feel Something.

And it's a ballad,

just an honest take on, hey, I've been sad.

And I had decided at that point

that I was interested in maybe starting my own foundation,

and I had to come up with a name for it.

And I was like, Feel Something.

I mean, that's what this is.

It's to connect, it's to remind people of their heart

and what really matters.

So I named it The Feel Something Foundation.

It's LGBTQ plus focused.

You know, we've definitely taken an interest

in a lot of specific things, you know,

namely gender affirming care centers.

'Cause I feel like what's missing,

in so many of these fear-based attacks

on these types of programs, is information.

I think people just don't understand.

You know, I hope that, you know,

in further moonlighting these organizations,

can just educate people.

'Cause ignorance is literally the number one enemy of change

and of, you know, personal freedom and expression.

[upbeat music]

The idea of a covers album came up and I thought,

you know what?

Now's the time to give people familiar songs,

things that they can wrap their head around right away.

Almost kind of go back to

sort of why American Idol worked for me.

One of the key tracks that we added sort of later

to High Drama is,

You Make Me Feel Mighty Real by Sylvester.

And to me that was a super exciting thing to do,

to be able to cover a icon who is sometimes a bit unsung,

but who is so ahead of his time.

I mean, he was basically fluid.

I mean, if we use the vernacular that we have today,

he was just queer as hell.

You know, in like Kaftans and fans and makeup,

like with a big disco hit, in the seventies in America.

So he's somebody that I was excited to cover.

And it really inspired me, and it made me think,

I wanna dive into a new direction,

where I get to connect more with that community

that I come from.

You know, we're at a time now in music,

where it's been proven that being queer,

and writing about queer topics is not necessarily

the career killer that they used to think it was.

I mean, there's an audience for it.

And it's not just queer kids, it's everybody.

People, the young people that are listening to music

are more and more open-minded.

They understand that the emotions

in these songs are universal.

They're not stupid.

They know how to go, oh well, I've felt something like that.

So, I'm really excited.

I feel like it's like a new chapter for me.

I feel clear, very clear.

I feel very sure of who I am,

more than I ever have,

more comfortable in my skin than I ever have.

And I want to bring that to my music.

Well, thank you so much,

for letting me ramble on about my life

over the past 41 years.

And I'm thankful that you took the time

to learn more about me and what makes me tick.

This has been, what's it called again? [laughing]

[Interviewers] Becoming Adam Lambert.

This has been Becoming Adam Lambert.